the last newsflash

oh ... le sigh, it is my last issue of the newsletter. i wrote a little goodbye to my kids. i will definitely miss them. i'll also miss my one co-worker friend and my fabulous assistant (although i hear i get TWO assistants at my new library. TWO!) other features in this newsletter are an entire section of poems by kid who hates hoboes (he is our resident poet now).

you may remember that kid who hates hoboes was not doing so well, you know getting left back and acting up. i'm happy to say that he has improved on some levels, like being a good poet, but then sometimes he falls into the trap of acting like a thug. it's very frustrating.

the other day my favorite kid comes in and tells me that kid who hates hoboes, along with another kid, "jumped" him outside the library after we closed. the story goes that KWHH repeatedly told FK to hand over his money, and then KWHH pushed FK into the bushes, causing him to lose his library card in said bushes. i was appalled.

now, you might not think that losing your library card is a big deal. but on the contrary, it is quite a big deal. first off, if someone finds the card they can use it and take out hundreds of dollars worth of stuff and never return it and then your account with us is ruined forever. that's the worst case scenario.

then, it costs $2 for a new card. again, that might not seem like a big deal but most of my kids don't have 2 bucks to spare. so i tell FK that we need to immediately mark his card "lost" so that no one can use it. and then when i look him up in the computer i find out that someone has already tried to fraudulently use his card at the central branch, and that his card is being held for him there.

on the one hand this is good news that we've located his card. but then he has to get himself to central, which involves crossing a major street and walking about a mile, or taking a bus. he really needs an adult for this. since his mother doesn't speak english, she is not typically helpful in taking control of these types of situations.

then he asks me if i could give him a note to give to the people at central to explain the situation. so i write him a little letter saying that he is who he says he is, blah blah blah, i'm a librarian, give him his card please. then he asks me (he's so cute) if he can just give the note to the people without saying anything. he's so sweet. i suggest to him that he say something like "i'm here to get my lost library card. i have a note." he's not crazy about this idea, but i encourage him that sometimes in the grown-up world we have to talk to other people even though its uncomfortable. being someone who often hates talking to other people, i can understand his pain.

then my fabulous assistant and i have a sit down with KWHH and his partner and crime. by this time i am furious with them. the partner in crime is immediately remorseful, and seems genuinely sorry. i soon realize he was just in the wrong place at the wrong time. which makes sense because he and FK are friends, and this kid has never been a problem. whereas KWHH is rolling his eyes at us, telling us he was just "playing," etc etc. its pretty infuriating. then i explain to him that pushing someone and demanding their money is not "playing" and that in the adult world such actions are considered to be attempted robbery and assualt. i also explain the ordeal that FK will have to go through to get his card back, and that in less than a 24-hour period someone has already tried to use FK's card. this gets to KWHH but he still tries to act like he is somehow beyond blame.

my assistant and i tell the kids they have to apologize to FK, and they agree. when FK comes in, the partner in crime immediately goes up to him and apologizes in a sincere fashion. FK accepts the apologize and then they read a comic book together and the whole thing is very heartwarming. KWHH takes this opportunity to suddenly become very serious about his studies and decides to immerse himself in his homework.

soon it is almost closing time, and i remind KWHH that he must apologize and that his time is running out. but he still maintains that he MUST
complete his homework. after a year and a half of slacking off, his homework is now a top priority. eventually i see that FK is leaving and i demand that KWHH go apologize. so he goes over to FK and mumbles something that kind of sounds like "i'm sorry," but overall the apology is pathetic. and my favorite kid and i both know it.

after FK leaves i reiterate to KWHH how disappointed i am not only in his actions, but in his lame apology. but what can you do?

a page from the book of life

god has this book, see? it's a book of life. and in the book he/she writes down all the good things and all the bad things about each and every person.

even though one could make an argument that i "am not very jewish," i think we can all agree that my jewish heritage is important to me in my own way. so even though i was trapped ... ahem, i mean working ... at library-in-the-hood this rosh hashanah i still celebrated it in my own way, thinking about my own book of life.

i decided to have a program with the children and discuss what rosh hashanah is about. when asked the kids knew the following points:

1. rosh hashanah is a day they have off from school
2. rosh hashanah is a jewish holiday
3. people pray on rosh hashanah

well, i'll give it to them. all those things are true. but i decided to elaborate on those things, telling them that rosh hashanah is the beginning of the jewish new year, and explaining how the jewish calendar is different from the regular calendar. then i told them that on rosh hashanah we think about how sweet life is, and about eating apples and honey, and how we remember all the good things we've done in the past year, while also thinking about what good deeds we can do in the future. i told them about mitzvahs, and how mitzvahs are good things you do for others (not for yourself). then i told them about how we also think about what bad things we've done, and we think about how we can make up for these bad things. oh and i talked about the shofar, which is always exciting.

then we did a craft. oh how i love crafts. we each made a book and colored in rosh hashana pictures. then we wrote all the mitzvahs we had done in the past year, and wrote a list of anything bad that we did that we would like to improve on or feel sorry about.

i made a big point of telling them that it is okay to have done something bad. everyone does. no one is perfect. but that we need to realize when we've done something bad and try to apologize for it, or do better next time. i also emphasized the importance of forgiving others when the apologize to us, and also forgiving ourselves. not that i'm trying to convert anyone, but i like for people to understand that judaism isn't one of those burn-in-hell type religions.

we went around and said some of the good things that we've done, and some of the things we feel sorry for. there were a couple of kids who do community service, so they discussed the volunteer work they're involved in. this led to a discussion about the community here, and what type of problems it has. a few kids mentioned domestic violence (and even used the term "domestic violence"). it was a bit disturbing. they went around the room citing examples of domestic violence that they had witnessed. one kid said that he was walking down the street with his friend's mother and a man approached her and began to beat her in the street. someone else confirmed that they had seen this happening from their apartment window. although the kids were clearly upset by these incidents, they also accepted them as a typical part of life.

after my friend rasha died, i had this epiphany that just being alive and well is a pretty amazing feat, and should not be taken lightly. our day-to-day problems, although they seem monumental to us, are not really a big deal. most things will be solved in due time. and if they aren't, then in due time we will learn to live with those problems that cannot be solved. but listening to these kids tell countless stories of domestic violence, i was overwhelmed with both sadness and fear. they have real problems to overcome. problems the rest of us will never know.

be thankful for what you have dear blog readers. be thankful.