physiognomy?

that's right dear blog readers, i am in the 130s! and i don't mean the Parapsychology & Occultism section.

now, as a WW member i am supposed to weigh myself once a week. however, i prefer obsessively weighing myself every day. that way i can pick up on any weight trends before they get out of control. now, i had stopped this practice for a while since it was so depressing to see my weight not change. but now that i am actually making some progress, i have gotten back into the habit.

so i was SHOCKED this morning when i weighed myself and i had broken past the 140 barrier, into the 130s where i belong. of course i still have a ways to go, but it was certainly very heartening. too bad i ate about 10 mini red velvet cupcakes today at our valentine's party. we'll see what effect this has tomorrow.

that's the weigh it is

so i have gained 2 pounds this week. urgh, that is not supposed to happen! i had lost four pounds! i was so close to getting the little star for losing 5 pounds! i want the star! moreso than that i want to be svelte ... but a star would be nice.

see, the bolshevik had this layoff party (he got laid off. no need to shed a single tear, he's thrilled about it) and i saved up all these points so i could drink lots o' alcohol. but what i didn't take into effect was that the bolshevik would be serving cake. and mashed potatoes. seriously, those two do not go together. and the day after said party i have visions of me sneaking very very small pieces of cake, or taking a little bite of mashed potatoes here and there. but i guess if you do that over and over and over again throughout the course of an evening it begins to add up. and i'm sure the late night tator tots at trash bar didn't help.

they say you shouldn't eat at night. but does it count if you're eating at 4 am? is that still night, or should it be applied to the next day?

all svelte up and nowhere to go

the glam rocker is dead to me! you heard it here first. and, beloved blog readers, please remind me never to get involved with someone who has his own "persona." seriously, what was i thinking?
so last night my roommate and i were on the roof smoking cigarettes (i don't even smoke cigarettes!) lamenting the state of romantical affairs, debating about whether or not we need to move to another city in order to be lucky in love. and she said to me that she felt that if only she were thinner, then her problems would be solved. "roommate!" i said, "you are plenty thin. you're a beautiful girl and don't let anyone tell you otherwise!"

and then i told her how i've become so svelte from the non-drinking and how this newfound svelteness has not helped me in ANY way. except of course that now when i am naked in front of the mirror i say things like, "damned! i'm svelte!" and i feel pretty good about myself. but ultimately, isn't it the human condition to want to share this svelteness with others? is that so wrong? is it too much to ask?

i believe i then said that i wanted to waste away and become a beautiful anorexic untouchable thing to be placed high on pedestals and loved from a distance. and then after that i said i wanted to move to some sort of jewish nunnery on a mountain top where i can finally have some peace and quiet. i'm kind of all over the place right now.

free day!

when i worked at hell's library, if you had a day off during the week, as i do today, it was called a "free day." and in the notes section of your time sheet you would write the word "free" so that everyone understood the reason that you did not come into work. library-in-the-hood has very similar time sheet rules to hell's library, so when i started working here i would write "free" on my time sheet, thinking that these two libraries shared the same lingo. and then after a few months (because everyone is so passive aggressive that they don't like to say things to my face) mr. assistant manager man (remember him? he was so nice) told me that people don't like it when i write the word free on my time sheet. sends the wrong message he said.
well $%&@ that.
i'm free! FREE! FREE!and i have woken up ridiculously early to run errands and finish novels. first i am going to the post office to return the ugly laptop bag i ordered during some sort of insomniac hallucination. seriously, i thought i had ordered something completely different. is this some strange sort of sleep walking type thing in which you purchase items online whilst only half conscious? then i am going to the dmv to make my fancy mobile (thank you bitch cakes for this fantastic term for my car) officially my fancy mobile. then i will have coffee with my bff so that we may gossip about glam rockers and the general state of affairs. and then i will have several hours of quality laptop time so that i may work on my first submission for my novel class. due tomorrow. (i have 9 pages!) and then i will go to punk rope, the greatest fitness class ever.
have i mentioned that i have convinced my punk rope instructor to do a class with the kids at library in the hood? they are very excited, as am i. they will be getting free jump ropes and buttons and temporary tattoos! yay!
also, have i mentioned that i have lost FIVE pounds from my decreased alcohol intake? now i am thinking maybe i should make this a permanent thing, as opposed to just a january thing. because really, if i have to choose between being drunk or being extra svelte .... i think i'm going to have to go with extra svelte.