forever a third

hey miss dewey decimal ... how much of your novel do you have written?

why dear blog readers, thanks for asking. i am a third of the way finished.

really? only a third? why is that?

well, i'll tell you dear blog readers. it's because i love to procrastinate. here is a rough approximation of this evening's activities. mind you, when i left work i had every intention to go to the coffeeshop and write.
6:30 arrive home
6:32 change into tank top and shorts
6:35 have epiphany that i have enough ingredients in the house to actually cook a meal
6:40 begin cooking
7:10 sit down to watch tv and eat food which i prepared MYSELF
7:30 continue to watch tv even though i am finished eating
8:00 do dishes
8:10 realize that i am actually very tired and do not want to go to coffeeshop. decide i will stay home and begin writing immediately
8:15 after staring at hair in mirror decide to put back my purple streak
8:15-8:35 dye hair
8:40 walk to deli to buy soy milk and fruit. on an impulse, i purchase an iced coffee
(my 9th coffee!)
8:55 begin writing
9:30 pat self on the back for figuring out how to footnote within a footnote
9:45 decide to take pictures of my hair for the blog
10:00 go back to writing
10:30 check email
10:45 check out my mom's blogger profile
11:00 call mom to tell her blogger profile is hysterical
11:30 decide to write a blog post while simultaneously sending text messages

and that dear blog readers is why you will not be reading my novel any time soon. sorry. but look at how cute my hair looks! it was looking a little too light before, no? needed a splash of color, don't ya think?

i'm a writer ... not an alarm clock

i think there are only three people in the world who will understand the title of this post (i hope you know who you are, my fellow bahama adventurers). don't expect me to explain it to the rest of you suckers.
i had quite a revelation this morning ... i realized that i am in fact a writer. i write this blog every day. EVERY DAY. not only that, i am currently writing a novel. i am not just saying i am writing a novel. i am actually doing it. so what do you call a person who is writing every day, both in blog and print form? well, i believe that person would be considered a writer. pretty cool, no?

ok, i lied

i know i just said i was going to go back to writing my novel, but instead i checked out the stats for the blog, which i check daily. and it turns out earlier today there was a hit from someone in israel. well, i am very thrilled that the readership of this blog has finally expanded out of north america (although we do have a reader in australia, but i know him so it doesn't count). person from israel, i salute you. and i hope you enjoy reading this blog.

not writing my novel: a daily activity

oh, why oh why am i not writing my novel? anyway, i am in starbucks yet again . verb, brooklyn label AND greenpoint coffeeshop were all packed. what gives? i SO wanted to go to verb and get the organic oatmeal (served with raisins, brown sugar, honey and steamed milk. yummm) but it was filled with a bunch of pretentious hipsters all sitting with their laptops ... oh wait, nevermind. anyway, i was so hungry searching for a place to sit and eat and write that i went to christina's and had some pierogies. and now i am sitting at the counter of starbucks, which is a place i hate out of principal yet find myself hanging out at more and more. damned them and their little green aprons! i wrote about a paragraph of my novel and now i am playing around on the internet thanks to their overpriced wifi that i cannot resist paying $9.99 for. but it's good for 24 hours! maybe i'll come back here after boot camp! must keep up the svelteness! i weighed in this morning at 133! woohoo! svelte ... so svelte.
ok ... will go back to writing my novel now. i swear.

what am i doing RIGHT NOW?

sitting in starbucks, not writing my novel. that's what.