Wednesday, March 7, 2007

as far as i know, it is not a crime to be homosexual in the library

in a rare turn of events, a man comes into the library with a legitimate reference question. GED requirements or something like that. as i begin to help him, a small haglike woman interrupts me, stating that there is a man harassing her and making a scene and that i must help her this instant. somehow i immediately know, whether it be through spidey senses or some librarian clairvoyancy, that this woman is not being harassed in any way shape or form. so i tell the hag she has to wait. i continue to help legitimate-patron-man and we exchange looks as hag woman skulks off. when ready, i walk over to the hag woman. she begins pointing feverishly at a man sitting across the room from her. he is a lean man who moves in effeminate gestures. his lips move slightly as sits quietly reading a gossip magazine. i turn back to the hag.
"you should have seen him before," she tells me.
"he seems to be fine now."
"look at the way he's moving his mouth."
i look at him again, and then turn back to the hag. "he's not making any noise," i say. "if he wants to move his mouth while reading that's fine."
she begins to pack up her belongings in a huff, "he was loud before. he was shouting. and he was acting all homosexual."
"well," i begin, "as far as i know there are no rules against being a homosexual in the library."
"well, i'm not going to stay here," she declares. then she storms off for dramatic effect.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I've delt with her at my berry b4. That guy has really poor taste in women