splendor in the ass III

so it has been a slow saturday morning in the library...nothing much to report. but i thought i would share a little anecdote from my days back at albany public...
i was checking in videos behind the circ desk and i open up a vhs case. i don't remember what movie it was for, something innocuous like robocop or top gun. anyway, it isn't the right movie in the case. in fact it isn't even one of the library's movies at all. the tape has a plain white label which reads "splendor in the ass III." well, i knew that i needed to stop working immediately and show this tape to all of my co-workers. so we all have a good laugh and try to think of what we'd say to this patron when he comes in looking for his beloved lost film. things like "oh, i think we may have your movie...let me ass you a few questions first." OR "oh yes, we found your movie. how splendid that you're here!" we kept the tape in the back office, prominently displaying it as a discssion piece for all employees. but sadly, when that special day came and mr. porn patron asked for his movie back, it was one of our more straight-laced employees who helped him, and no puns, witticism, or innapropriate remarks were made. such a shame, an opportunity like that wasted. *sigh*