Saturday, April 7, 2007

the easter bunny came early this year, even to visit jews like myself

there is this woman who comes into the branch now and again; she is a notorious trouble maker, but for some reason she seems to like me. just me. she is sweet as punch to me and no one else. and other people notice this. they've said that she always has a favorite. and usually her favorite has short blonde hair. curious. very curious. now, when you speak to her you can tell that something isn't quite right. there is a craziness lurking behind her eyes waiting to come out. so she comes in today and wishes me a happy easter. i thank her and wish her the same. then she asks me if i have any plans. i say no (although my mom is coming out to brooklyn to visit and we have discussed wearing bonnets). crazy lady is dismayed by this. "no plans?" she says sadly, "nothing at all?" so i tell her that i am jewish. then she goes into this whole monologue about jews and how they never get the good candy and how her jewish friends love candy canes and now they have blue candy canes and they never had those back in her day blah blah blah. and then she leaves. but that of course is not the end of the story. she comes back fifteen minutes later and presents me with a cadbury cream egg. now i LOVE cadbury cream eggs, but as soon as she hands the shiny foiled egg to me i am VERY afraid. visions of this insane woman with a syringe injecting my cream egg with god knows what are suddenly dancing in my head. but i take it from her politely and say thanks and all that, and then throw it in the nearest garbage can as soon as she leaves. note to self: buy four-pack of cadbury cream eggs on your way home.

1 comment:

jennifer said...

Some people get roses you get candy...I'd prefer candy every time.